USING RELATIONSHIPS – ARE THEY A COMMODITY? – Use and Throw! 

Do we use relationships to fulfill our needs? Do we throw them in the bucket as a used commodity? — USE AND THROW!  Are we opportunists? Unfortunately, most people are. One day we find garbage of relationships around us that putrefy and stink.

“Sir, this is the perfect pen for you”, the medical representative said while placing a plastic pen on the table.

“Can it be refilled once the ink is gone?” I asked.

“No, Sir, this is the use and throw.” The agent grinned.

An array of weird thoughts started knocking at my mind’s door – Do people use relationships like a pen and throw them in the nearest trashcan once the emotional juices dry up? — As if it’s a commodity.

A false pretension of caring and priority is cruel and emotionally harsh to the person who is being used. It is not a crime but a sin. It’s the nastiest feeling to know that you were being used, lied to, and blatantly cheated by someone you trusted.

Humanity was created for Love—to be loved. Flora and fauna and commodities were created to be used by humans — but see what happened — people started loving mundane possessions. They started using each other’s emotions and sentiments for their ulterior motives.

In the process of lying and deceit, the essence of Love is lost and what comes forth is the nasty persona of egoism and selfishness.

A series of SIX ‘F’s explain the motives and philosophy of the person who ‘uses’ someone – FIND . . .  FOLLOW . . . FISH OUT . . .  FLUSH . . .  FORGET . . .  and FLY.

These people are on the lookout for soft and sensitive targets. They follow their targets, luring them with their sugar-coated and selfish mannerisms. After quenching their unsatiated bellies with loads of emotions and favors, the targets are flushed out, ditched, and forgotten. It is miserable how quickly can people forget once they get what they wanted from you.

For them, the relationship is a commodity — used and thrown away.

The irony is that you think you mean something to someone, but they just show their actual colors and prove you wrong – they turn around when you need them.

“Don’t take advantage of a kind heart – you may not be offered one again.”

While in medical school, we dealt with a different breed of hostellers. These boys were night-mongers. They studied late at night when the hostel was asleep. During the day and evening hours, they entertained themselves by creating ruckus in the corridors or barging into the rooms of the engrossed boys by disturbing them.

“I am not an entertainer to amuse your needs according to your whims and requirements – I am not a provider of favors – I don’t like being used – don’t use me as an option when you have diverse priorities.”

Ditching relationships is always aching. It affects sensitive people more because they give their everything in the relationship.

 Isn’t it miserable when people ‘you know’ become people’ you knew’? Meeting them on a social platform and trying to ignore them as if they were never a big part of your life is both derogatory and insulting.

The ill-feeling you give to someone is remembered throughout life – your statements and actions may, however, be forgotten and ignored.

Gradual withdrawal from a relationship is less painful as people get used to the distance – but imagine someone disappears, never to show up. It takes away all of your mental control, leaving behind an aftermath of guilt and insanity.

Before entering into the arena of relationships, ponder over your piousness and commitments – don’t enter into someone’s life when you have no intention of staying. Don’t make a tool of someone’s heart—it hurts, it sure does. After all, it’s not a commodity. Don’t be opportunistic in Love by using situations unfairly to gain an advantage, without even thinking, how your actions will affect the person.

“I used to think that the worst thing in life was to end up all alone — It’s not. The worst thing in life is ending up with people who make you feel all alone.” ROBIN WILLIAMS.

‘APPRECIATE WHAT YOU HAVE BEFORE IT TURNS INTO WHAT YOU HAD.’ This holds true for all relationships, friendships and Love.

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