GIVING A SECOND CHANCE – to life or relationships – shouldn’t we?

 Embracing a second chance in life or relationships is not just a mere opportunity but a transformative journey. It’s a path filled with the potential for growth and new experiences. Life’s unexpected twists and turns and the obstacles we face are lessons that strengthen us and make us wiser and more compassionate. A fresh start opens doors to rediscovering joy, bliss, and meaning, offering a hopeful outlook.

What truly matters is our willingness to face and accept life’s challenges. This willingness is a testament to our resilience and belief in the potential for brighter days.

Practice makes a man perfect, but that doesn’t mean we must pursue perfecting a mundane life or a stale, sulking relationship and deny ourselves chances. The human tendency is to keep trying, and that’s what the teaching is— ‘keep trying, and you will surely succeed one day.’

Life thrives on the availed chances, the perils, leaps of faith, and decisions that push us beyond our comfort zones. Every chance can alter the story, opening new opportunities and helping us discover parts of ourselves we never knew existed. The greatest penances usually come from the chances we didn’t take and botched to trust our aptitudes and capabilities.

For instance, a friend took the much-hyped Indian Administrative Exam on the first attempt and cracked PCS. Discontented, he reappeared and qualified as an IRS. Still unhappy, he took the exam for the third time and topped IAS. This is a clear example of how persistence and second chances can lead to great success, inspiring us to keep trying in the face of adversity and feeling determined and inspired.

Sometimes, you need a second chance because you weren’t quite ready the first time. The first chance gives you a feel, while the second makes you a front-runner to accept the encounter right in the bulls-eye.

Mistakes are the building blocks of a perfect life. They equip us with the knowledge and tools to face challenges confidently and resiliently. Understanding this and learning from mistakes empowers us to take advantage of second chances, leading to personal growth and enlightenment.

Does life give anyone a second chance? Or does love provide a second chance to a jilted lover? The proposition is not to look for or wait for a second chance. The question is, why wait for a second chance?

Anyone looking for a second chance makes it his nature and personality. The first opportunity is always half-hearted because there is scope for a second and maybe a third chance. Do such people succeed in life? Well, there are several examples where people excelled after initial failures. I remember a schooltime poem – ‘Try again…’. The poem’s essence is loud and clear – keep trying till you succeed. After all, everyone commits mistakes, takes lessons to improve, and emerges as a winner.

RICK PRICE said, ‘Every moment in your life is a second chance.’ Well, the philosophy behind this is debatable.

People, however, do evolve and develop self-awareness. They may not fundamentally change their stance and nature, but they may surprise people with their actions and achievements if given a second chance. This means that they are worth a second chance. Right? After all, everyone deserves a second chance to clean up their mess, provided they don’t screw it up again.

Sometimes, opportunities don’t give a second chance to the person. The train is missed, and the other one is not in sight. The first door may shut off, cutting off traffic that could have opened several doors. Life can be ruthless, and the intelligent consumer who holds the opportunity like a precious commodity may be the winner.

Attending a hand surgery conference in Kolkata connected me to the best person who did microsurgery in San Francisco. Subsequently, the doors kept opening, and I visited the best Microsurgery centres around the globe to get trained in the best possible way. What would have happened if I had not attended the Kolkata conference? The doors opened because I wisely availed myself of my first chance assertively, kept availing the subsequent chances, and never looked back.

Someone asked, ‘What if you fall? I smiled and said – ‘What if I fly?’

We give people and relationships several chances to forgive for whatever absurdity they hold to us. This is more about our convenience and needs and preserving our sanity than a desire to be labelled as the world’s most generous and humble person.

Most marriages survive the cult of giving chances and concessions to the spouses despite physical and emotional abuse or adultery. This is wittingly called adjustment, compromise, and reconciliation. However, the present generation has formulated rules and disagrees, bestowing a second chance on a failing relationship.  Instead, they look for a second chance in their lives and deserve to resurrect the damage with a fresh start.

Trivial arguments, brief skirmishes and fights are common in relationships and teach something new about the person. That’s how it works. “Real relationships are not perfect – and perfect relationships are not real.”

 Does Love give one a second chance?

The ‘first love’ often happens as a mere infatuation and lacks depth and maturity. It frequently shatters in heartbreaks and jilts. Life provides a second chance in love, but there is a fear of getting hurt for similar reasons.

“Until we have seen someone’s darkness, we don’t know who they are. We don’t know love until we forgive someone’s darkness.” MARIANNE WILLIAMSON.

You should be okay with giving someone a second chance as long as they know there won’t be a third. You can’t give a second chance to those who only realised your worth by losing you – they, however, never cherished it in the first place and made the mistake of taking you for granted.

“People make mistakes, but if you fail to learn from them—I have no more time to waste on you.” This statement underscores the importance of learning from our mistakes. It’s a call to be reflective and introspective, to use second chances wisely. It’s a reminder that second chances are not to be taken for granted but used as an opportunity for growth and self-improvement.

So, next time you give someone a second chance, always contemplate first—would you like to avail yourself of it, or do you deserve a second chance if you had committed a similar mess?

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